Welcome to My Life By: Hermione Granger
by kimchase
Summary: Hermione never thought she'd ever keep a diary, but when Voldemort's after you, and you had unusually bushy hair, not to mention you think you fancy your best friend that didn't realize you were a girl until forth year, you know a diary is a must!
1. August 25

**A/N: **A little fic I started… well I found it in one of my files and I was like 'when did I write this?' then I changed it up a bit (well actually a lot!) and I thought I'd post it up… though until I'm finished This Time Around I can't really update often on this story… I hope you like it! Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.

August 25

I feel incredibly stupid, granted I'm not, but sometimes you just feel stupid and right now I do. Why? Because I'm actually writing in an offending female stereotypical object! Also known as a diary, though I prefer to call it a journal it sounds less… girly. Yes, Hermione Granger, bookworm, know-it-all (as Ron likes to call me), smarty-pants (Lavender called me this once, reminds me of the chocolate smarties, hmmm a pair of pants made of chocolate? Sounds delicious, I bet the twins would love to steal this idea!), teacher's pet, realist, practical girl is writing in a book attempting to get my thoughts and feelings on paper.

Well how did it happen? A book convinced me. Surprise, surprise. After reading a book on self-therapy that my mother gave me I decided to write my frustration down. After all at times like these, when Voldemort is a common threat, one should be able to vent out their emotions. It's stupid really, any one can access to my thoughts! But thankfully I have found the most perfect book in Diagon Alley. The pages are charmed to look like one of my text books but after you say the password it reveals the real pages inside. I've got mine to look like an Arithmancy text book since no body bothers to read those. I like to think it's quite clever of me. My password is something you'd never guess I'd use for my password. It's a phrase, a lot of people started using the phrase or rather singing it at quidditch games. It's 'Weasley is my king'. The real phrase is 'Weasley is our king' but 'my king' sounds much better. I don't know why I decided to use it, it's just I thought no one would guess.

I don't think anyone realizes that I actually have a little thing for my best friend. Okay maybe a little more than a little thing… it's gotten so big that I might even suspect it to becoming to actually fancying RON! To think I would like one of my best friends! It's unthinkable but true nonetheless. It's shameful how flustered I get when he's around. That's why I like it when we fight then I can easily pretend I don't fancy him one bit. But of course it just ends up hurting me. Oh gosh I sound like a love-sick teenage girl! But it's nice to have it out in the open, to admit it even if it's only in writing. But the git (pardon the language) he doesn't even notice me! He didn't realize that I was a girl until forth year! How dense can you get? I hope sincerely that now seventeen and of age he will see me as a mature young lady that could very well be courted.

I still can't believe he went out with that slag (again pardon the language) Lavender Brown! He seems real interested in blonds who have bigger breast than their brains. First Fleur (yes she is smart but still acts like a bimbo!), and now Lavender. Thank Merlin he got rid of her!

I don't get why he doesn't see me as anything else than his best friend. Maybe it's my bushy hair? I tamed it down, or rather it tamed down itself over the years. Starting from forth year it started being more tolerable. Now during the summer it suddenly became curlier and less bushy. It's rather nice. Though I still have my dull brown eyes no comparison to Lavender's blue ones! I can't believe I'm here comparing myself to her! How low can I get? Now I have to call this book a diary it's becoming more of a diary than a journal!

Well no more, I will continue on trying to make it a journal. The serious stuff. Voldemort. I can not say his name out loud because unlike Harry I am afraid. It's pathetic I know but at least I can write it down. Voldemort reminds me of Hitler. Hitler wanted a perfect all-pure blooded Germans just like Voldemort wants all pure-blooded wizards and witches. Hitler killed Jews because they were Jews, just like Voldemort killed muggles because they are muggles. Hitler is a hypocrite because he was not a pure blooded German but he only wanted pure blooded Germans in Germany and Voldemort is not a pure-blooded wizard, (his father was a muggle) but he wants only pure blooded wizards and witches in the Wizarding World. See how alike they are? Oh I almost forgot! They have another thing in common. They are both horrible to look at! I hope just like Hitler Voldemort will suicide to save us the trouble.

But I think Harry want to kill Voldemort himself. Harry is so brave. If I had the whole world on my shoulders I would never be able to handle the pressure. But he is too noble! To dump Ginny because it would keep her safe is too Prince Charming-like. Chivalry is dead! This is the 20th century! Hello wake up Harry! Women can protect themselves! Ginny was crushed when Harry broke up with her. I would be too if the guy of my dreams since when I was five (when she heard the story of Harry Potter) dumped me for a stupid reason! Men are the most idiotic beings on the planet! They are ruining the world! See just look at all the people that created war! They were all male leaders! Ok sure there are heroes too… And yes I have nothing against my two best friends but still they need some sense knocked into them!

Ginny wrote me that she's going to wait for Harry. Though she's going to torture him by going out with many guys before hand! He deserves it… sort of. She's going for the jealous approach. It's rather funny to think about and Harry won't have a clue she will be doing it on purpose! She has even bought some revealing robes to 'tempt him' as she said.

Ginny has become so pretty over the years, you'd hardly recognize her as the shy little girl. In fact she's as devious as the twins! Her red hair is beautiful and luscious and I can't even compare mine to it! She has the most sparkling brown eyes, almost a golden hazel. And she has a body that Fleur would be proud of. Yes, Ginny Weasley is the Griffindor Beauty. Even the Slytherins are commenting on how they'd go out with her if she weren't a Griffindor!

I've been getting letters from Viktor again this summer, he's rather eager that I'm of age now and that I can apparate he wants me to visit him sometime in the summer. Well in all his letters he mentioned it. But mother and father said no, I'm kinda glad. I've never been to Bulgaria and I don't think I can apparate that far! It'll take all the energy out of me or I'll leave my eyebrows behind like Ron did. He was disappointed but he just sent me a letter that he will be touring around Europe for quidditch games. He says he'll be sending me tickets for me and my friends to watch his game. I know Harry will be thrilled being such a fan of quidditch, he really needs a time off from all the work he has been doing for the research of horocruxs.

It's so weird that I won't be going back to Hogwarts! That I won't be able to be Head Girl! Professor McGonagall informed me that I was to be Head Girl and that Phillipe Craving was to be Head Boy. I was hoping it'd have been Ron… not that it was because we would be sharing our own common room or anything. It would have been better than sharing rooms with Lavender! I suppose it doesn't matter, Hogwarts isn't existing at the moment. Though after the war ends I hope it will be up and running again. Perhaps I'll even volunteer to be a professor for the first couple of years. Just think it by then I'll be in my twenties!

This summer is the last time in a long while where I will be not researching or fighting or doing something for the war. Harry told me and Ron to have time with family, while he is in Grimmauld Place reading and trying to figure out an item of Ravenclaw's that Voldemort could have gotten a hold of.

Ron is at the Burrow with Ginny. Haven't had any owls from him though… Harry told me Ron had owled him! I thought something had changed between us at Professor Dumbledore's funeral! I guess I misinterpret it. I mean he probably just comforting me because I was crying. Well I can't really expect much from him he's Ron after all! Well enough of that. I don't want to talk about him anymore. Okay maybe I do… Ron is so complicated! One minute I really think he might fancy me back and the next minute I think he hates my guts! Why can't he be like a book where I could easily read and understand? I wish boys came with manuals then maybe Ginny and I will have fewer problems. But alas they do not come with manuals so we'll have to do without them.

Anyways back to serious stuff. I really need to stop getting distracted this is after all a journal not a diary. Now, I owled Harry that I'll be coming to Grimmauld Place on August the 30th. He says that any time is fine. He insists I bring all the books I have with me, especially Hogwarts, a History: A Second Edition, a new book I got my hand on as soon as it was hot off the press. It's an interesting read, though I didn't get a chance to read all of it due to being on vacation with my parents in France. Really it was like their second honeymoon but they brought me along with them. It was a nice break from all the war planning that's been on my mind. But now I'm back and as worried as ever. Harry says he wants to find everything about Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and preferably Slytherin. He's trying to find anyone that's had direct contact with Voldemort that could pass him some kind of memory. Dumbledore's pensieve was given to Harry along with some other precious artifacts he had, the others were given to his brother. There are a lot of neat things Dumbledore had, many of them I haven't read about but I will get started on that so we know what their functions are. I'm almost excited; learning is something I always enjoyed. Like my father said, 'knowledge is best shared'.

Well it seems though my mother is keen on having me act more like a girl. She has went and bought a ton of things I will never be using. She got me some new robes that look scandalous! (she received help from Ginny) She also got me some beauty products I'm frightened to use, things called: 'Hair Spray 2000, one spray will keep your hair in the desired style! Just think it and you'll have it!' and 'Color-changing gloss, lip gloss that won't be a dull one color but ten colors to transform into! You'll never need another lip gloss with this handy tool!'. I haven't even gone through half the things she got for me. Mother understands that this is a crucial time so she thinks I should enjoy it while it lasts. 'You won't be seventeen forever!' she says. I'll be bringing the new products to Grimmauld Place because I promised Ginny that I'll share.

She told me the whole family will be going to Grimmauld Place before Bill's wedding, which is on the first day of September. His face had gotten better and a healer had done a charm so that only a faint trace of the scars is seen. Thankfully he is not a werewolf. Professor Lupin was the most grateful one, glad that no one had to suffer like he is. He also lives with Harry, has been ever since the funeral.

It's depressing to talk about this. I still can't believe Professor Dumbledore is dead! Not to mention that it was Snape, of all people, was who killed him! Professor Dumbledore was the one who trusted Snape, the one who brought him in! How could he turn his back on him? How could he betray us? I hate Snape as much as Harry and Ron do now. Can't trust him and never will. But enough about Snape.

It's weird, before Hogwarts I was a normal girl… well as normal as one can be when one was born gifted. But now I'm involved with murders, death, fighting, evil, and everything possible that I thought I'd never experience in my lifetime. It's scary but I'm ready to face it head on, for Harry, for Ron, for my parents, for everyone I love. Now it's getting a little too serious. I hope no body finds this and figures out the password.

Sometimes I dream that Ron or Harry or my parents will be dead. I'll come home and see their dead bodies littered on the ground and an evil being with two red eyes burning into me standing behind them. I can still hear the echo of his maniac laughter ringing in my head. I wake up sweating and breathing heavily. Sometimes there are objects thrown to the ground. I'm afraid but I can't show it and it's killing me. I can't tell my parents they hardly know what's going on, they don't even know about the school closing, hence all the stuff my mom bought me. I can't tell Ginny she already has a handful to worry about. All her family is involved with it somehow including the guy she loves and she has enough nightmares about the chamber of secrets. I can't tell Harry I mean he has the whole world on his shoulders I can't bear to let my burdens out on him. I can't tell Ron because he also is worried over everything. I don't want to put unneeded worries in people's minds. I think I'll just bear with it and write it down here, though it won't be as good as talking to someone. Maybe this journal idea wasn't so stupid after all. I hope I'll get through this year alive to write more.

(large ink streak across the page)

Oops sorry… Pig just came in from the open window. Of course this means it's Ron's letter! Here I'll just stick it in here so I won't have to rewrite it.

_Hermione,_

_Sorry I haven't been able to write much but between writing to Harry (he has to be lonely being with only Remus and all… though I hear Tonks visits often along with occasional visits from other order members) and getting out of the way for the wedding. It's ridiculous in here, everyone is running around. The twins are blowing things up and mum is yelling at everyone as usual, she doesn't seem to do anything else. You must be wondering why in bloody hell did I write then? Well Fleur has suddenly decided that she wanted three bride's maids and no one from France really wanted to fly in just to be a bride's maid and all her friends seems to be married. So she decided that you will be the third along with Ginny and Gabrielle. I hope you don't mind, you'll have to come early to the Burrow. I'll come by tomorrow to pick you up. Fleur needs to measure your sizes or something. Don't say no because Fleur will literally kill people. Sometimes I think she's scarier than You-Know-Who._

_Ron_

Well what did I expect? A fancy love letter? A nice greeting that asks if I am well? Nope. It figures it'd be about some kind of thing he wants from me. I'm trying not to sound bitter but please he didn't even ask how my summer was! I just might say no to spite him. But it's Fleur and Bill's wedding so I suppose I should say yes. So I simply wrote 'alright I'll do it' and sent Pig off on its way.

It'll be nice to see him again, and Ginny. Ginny has told me before that she was wearing a pale green dress, and Gabrielle was wearing a pale pink one (she's the maid of honor). I suppose I'll be wearing a dress as well… A DRESS! Oh just brilliant! I hate formal dresses! Though it seems to grab the male's attention… like in forth year. I guess I have to wear one either way. I hope I don't trip; I'm not very graceful in heels.

I can picture it:

Gabrielle in her pink dress walking oh so gracefully like the half-veela she is. Her long blonde hair, no doubt Ron admires it. Her slim figure and curves that are much more developed than mine even though she is a year younger than me!

Then Ginny in her green dress that looks wonderful with her red hair. She simply looks fabulous in green! Ginny is also taller than me with long legs that I couldn't even dream of. Well she's only about two inches taller than me… but still! She probably could pass as a supermodel! I don't think there are supermodels in the Wizarding World though… maybe I should look that up.

Then me… plain brown curls with a dress color that probably doesn't suit me well. Probably looking like a sumo wrestler compared to the other two! I bet I'll be looking down at my feet the whole time. And my shoes will catch on the dress and BAM! I'm down on the floor with the biggest bruise forming on my face!

I'll ruin the whole wedding! Oh maybe I should have said no… Why am I so paranoid? I never used to care about how I looked before! Okay… starting from when I realized the guys didn't know I was a girl in forth year I guess I started to care about my appearance a bit. But never like this! I can't believe I sound like Lavender!

Okay this book is officially turning into a diary! I'm going to stop writing its turning me into one of them! (them meaning Lavender) I'm going to get some sleep it's already over twelve and Ron is coming tomorrow! I seriously need to talk to Ginny about my rapid transformation into a Lavender-clone. Soon I'll be calling Ron Won-Won! Oh the sheer terror! The horror! The crude fate to turn into a Lavender-clone! Okay I have to stop over reacting… though it is dreadful to think about being turned into a Lavender-clone. It makes me shudder just thinking about it. I seriously need to get some sleep, getting deprived from my regular sleep time is causing me to act unlike myself, thus resulting me to talk like an insane woman that could very well be sent to St. Mugo's. Sleep.

**A/N:** It's a little short… because well it's a diary and the length varies a lot so sometimes there might be short ones and some might be super long. But bear with me as I try to update as often as I can, with two stories and school work I'm going to be pretty slow on updates… Ron and Hermione isn't my favorite couple it's actually James and Lily but I can never think of a good plot for a James and Lily story. Well I'll probably write one… someday!

**Question:** does Hermione sound OOC? I hope not… but I think she does!

Everyone knows what I'm going to say here… **REVIEW!** Because I want to know what you think! Your opinion means the world! So please, please, please review!


	2. August 26

**A/N:** REVIEW! Thank you for all the people who reviewed! There are review responses at the end! If you have any comments or suggestions or anything please please review after reading! ENJOY!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, I swear.

August 26

Can you guess where I am? Never mind I'll tell you, I'm in Ginny's room! Ginny's painting her nails in the bed next to mine and humming the wedding march. She was always one of those girls who probably dreamed of her wedding since she was small. I'm more of those girls who wondered why the sky was blue.

I've been itching to write in here since I had arrived. So many things have happened it's a wonder why my heart isn't beating out of my chest.

Ginny just asked me if I was writing a diary. I told her no that I was merely processing my thoughts down on paper. She laughed and said that I was writing a diary. Then suddenly her face went grim and I know she's thinking of Riddle's diary. She snapped out of it and is smiling again humming softly as if nothing's wrong. But I know better. She never talked about it to me, at least not in detail and I wish she did. I suppose everyone has their secrets, some are darker than others.

Enough of this depressing stuff; I'm going to write the events of today. Oh it makes me angry just thinking about it!

I woke up late, because I had been writing in this book into late hours of the night. My mom probably didn't wake me since she believes 'a growing girl needs her sleep' or so she says. No one was home then, since both my parents left for work and I have no siblings. I took a long hot shower and rested for the day reading a cheesy romance novel that mom had bought a bunch of. I've read all the books in the house with no resent visits to the library so I was stuck reading them. Some of them were pretty decent but some are trashy.

It wasn't until the clock rang for twelve o'clock that I started worrying Ron had perhaps forgotten that he had to come get me. All these doubts ran through my head and I paced the room. I jumped when I heard a noise behind me. I turned and found the fireplace glowing with light before a figure tumbled through. For some reason I was so shocked that I hit the unknown figure with the book in my hand. When the thing I hit shouted a loud 'ow' that I realized that it was Ron.

The conversation went something like this:

Me: Oh! (covering my mouth with my hand) I'm so sorry Ron; I thought… well I don't know what I thought. You just surprised me is all.

Ron: Ow… (rubbing his head and getting up) you didn't have to hit me with a… what did you hit me with?

Me: (blushing) A book…

Ron: Figures it'd be a bloody book, that's the only thing you do, read!

Me: It wouldn't hurt to be more knowledgeable and read unlike doing pointless things like… like quidditch!

Ron: POINTLESS!? What are you talking about? Quidditch isn't pointless! It's exercise and fun! You're only saying that because you can't play it.

Me: As if I'd waste my time doing that, I've got better things to do!

Ron: Like what? Read up on… (grabs the book from me) "Kisses in the Moonlight"? (he scrunched up his face)

Me: (blushing) Give that back! (I tried reaching for it)

Ron: (putting it out of my reach and smirking) I didn't know you read books like these, sounds like stuff Ginny talks about.

Me: (cursing Ron for being so tall) I- er- just give it back! (jumping up and down and going on my tippy toes)

Ron: (opening the book and reading random pages) "The way the light shone in her hair making it glisten made her all the more beautiful in his eyes." "She laughed and it was music to his ears" (he laughs) Oh Merlin, I'd never thought you'd read things like this! All this time I thought the only thing you knew were text books! Who'd think Hermione Granger would be such a GIRL!

Read the sentence above again. It says "Who'd think Hermione Granger would be such a GIRL!" can you believe it? What did he think I was? A BOY? Honestly of all the things he could say! Well this just proves it; we could never be more than friends. I'm an idiot for thinking other wise! Of course I didn't speak to him and merely snatched the book and ran up stairs to retrieve my luggage. He didn't even try to apologize or follow me to offer me help, not that I would let him carry my things after what he had done. I think it took all my willpower not to cry right then. I wanted to slap him real hard but then I think I'd start crying. So I waved my wand and took my things down. When I went down Ron actually looked nervous. He tried to speak to me but I ignored him. I grabbed the floo powder from his hands and threw it in before going in myself and yelling my destination.

I don't think he even realizes what he has done wrong because he didn't even think to apologize! The whole day I didn't speak to him and yet he didn't even utter a 'sorry'! I don't even know why I like him!

Ginny says Ron had been really anxious to see me again. But I guess he just wants to see his friends and have an excuse to escape chores. Ginny just shakes her head and laughs. I don't know why she thinks it's so funny! Well tonight Ginny is trying out all the new things my mom bought me. She's staring at the lip glosses like she's never seen them before and I'm afraid! She's grinning evilly and she grabs one and tries it. It looks good on her; I think I should give it to her. Ginny insists she doesn't want to have it only wants to borrow it. She'll probably be the only one that uses it anyways… I don't see the difference.

Anyways that's not all that happened, I got sidetracked by Ginny. So when I arrived Ginny greeted me. The rest of the family was out or busy with something or the other. Immediately we ditched Ron and ran upstairs. She eyed me strangely.

Me: What?

Ginny: (shrugs) Don't you want to spend the day with Ron?

Me: No.

Ginny: (quirks her eyebrow) Okay, what did he do now?

Me: (crosses my arms) What are you talking about? Just because I don't want to be around him doesn't mean I'm mad at him or anything.

Ginny: (rolls her eyes) Yeah, and I'm a little pink bunny. Come on, you spend every bloody second with him so there has to be something wrong when he doesn't!

Me: NO! You make me sound like I'm in love with him or something!

Ginny: You said it, not me.

She says it like I can't live without her insufferable brother! As if I'm always beside him or something! I don't like what she's implying… it makes my head hurt with questions I don't want to know the answer to. She's playing with my mind, making me feel like I… well… like I… l-love him. That can't be possible right? I mean just because I think he's loyal, friendly, funny and quite handsome, even smart when he wants to be. And I think about him more than I should. Oh also how he makes me blush and how angry I get when he's with some other girl doesn't mean anything!

Oh my gosh…

I am in love with him!

But he's my best mate this isn't possible! I mean he doesn't like me that way! No I don't like him… at least not like that. I'm going to write about something else… like what else happened.

It's rather disastrous. In my rush to go to the Burrow I had forgotten to tell my parents that I was going. Of course this thought didn't cross my mind at all. After all I had been angry and very upset due to the new idea that I might… well that I might love Ron (insane that Ginny is).

It turns out that my parents had been given an emergency button that is directly connected to the Order. When they arrived home from work and didn't find me in it they panicked and pressed the button. The Order members excluding the Weasley family had not been aware that I was going to the Burrow to participate in the wedding so they naturally assumed that I had been kidnapped.

It had been absolutely crazy, the members of the order were called in for an emergency meeting regarding my disappearance. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Bill, Charlie, now Percy too all went to the meeting. They didn't know I was at their home since none of them saw me as I entered.

You should have seen it! Mrs. Weasley running around screaming at the top of her lungs shouting for Ron. She was sobbing endlessly looking horribly red. Mr. Weasley was smoking his pipe and pacing worriedly. Bill and Charlie were talking rapidly while Percy was looking around hectically. Professor McGonegall popped in to gather them to the Grimmauld Place. She herself looked pale white in fear.

Ginny and I had been peering over the stairs watching the whole drama. I had no idea they were looking for me because I couldn't understand all the shouting and murmurs.

Ron was stomping down the stairs seconds later and didn't see us. He looked confused himself but started yelling after he heard the news looking like he was on the verge of tears.

I could hear his foul words from where I was. Ginny and I hadn't had the slightest clue to what had happened.

Suddenly Harry came with my parents. Mom was crying hysterically and dad was trying to sooth her but unsuccessfully because he too was crying.

I stayed frozen in my crouched position. Only one question went through my head, what had happened? Ginny shifted beside me but didn't move.

Harry stepped in and raised his hands much like Professor Dumbledore at the first Hogwarts' feast. He looked very much in authority.

Harry: Everyone please be quiet!

For some odd reason everyone stood quiet and stared at Harry, who looked very much like a man now that he was seventeen. I heard Ginny suck in a breath, she probably was thinking the same thing I was.

Harry: Now I know it looks very grim, but I have hope that she's fine. She is the smartest witch of her year.

Ginny and I shared a look.

Harry: We'll start a search party, two groups of three and the rest will stay here for any news.

Professor McGonegall: Mr. Potter is right. We must keep a level head. Now I will choose the six individuals who will search for Miss. Granger.

That was when it finally clicked. As if someone triggered an ON button I bolted up and ran down the steps with Ginny right behind me.

Me: Er… hello?

Ginny: Hey everyone! Hermione's right here!

Mom: Her- Hermione? (she runs over and hugs me) we thought you were taken away!

Dad: Hermione, where were you?

Me: I was here the whole time, Ron came to get me.

Everyone turned to Ron.

Ron: I thought you guys meant she was taken while she had been here, it's not like any of you told me the whole story.

Mr. Weasley: I suppose none of us were rational, but we're glad you're okay Hermione.

Mrs. Weasley: Why doesn't everyone stay? I'll cook up a feast for everyone! Come, into the dining room.

Harry: It's good to see you Hermione. (turns to Ginny) Ginny.

Ginny: Harry.

Me: Let's go eat!

And I dragged the both of them to the dining room. I made them sit beside each other while I sat across to supervise. I managed to stay away from Ron and sat between Professor McGonegall and Professor Lupin. I could never call Professor Lupin Remus like Ron and Harry do it seems so wrong. He was our Professor! Mrs. Weasley miraculously served up piles upon piles of food with made my parents look shocked. Ginny was obviously on-purpose trying to get in contact with Harry while trying to make it look like it was accidental. She reached over for the bread basket way over on Harry's side and managed to brush against his chest. He moved back slightly looking surprised. I watched her place her hand on his leg as she came back with the basket. I stifled a giggle and shared a knowing look with Ginny.

Ginny: Fleur's going to be here tomorrow to take your sizes because she needs to talk with her family for the perfect colour for you. (she rolls her eyes)

Harry: Take her sizes? What are you talking about?

Me: I'm going to be a bride's maid in their wedding.

Harry: Really? Wow! (he smiles)

Professor Lupin: Who's the groom's man who'll be walking with you?

Ginny: I'm walking with Charlie and Gabrielle is walking with George. I think Hermione will be with Fred.

Me: You mean neither Percy nor Ron are groom's men?

Ginny: Well they have like a system that they'll take the brothers closest to their age but Percy hadn't been there when Bill was choosing so… I'm sure Percy and Ron with the twins would probably be groom's men for Charlie.

I guess I was sort of disappointed to hear that I won't be walking down the aisle with Ron, but I was still angry at him so I was sort of glad. I looked over to where Fred was sitting, he was laughing at something someone had said. He wasn't so bad. He had dark red hair and blue eyes like Ron though Ron's were softer. Fred had a fair amount of freckles but Ron had more which were adorable. Fred was tall but not as tall as Ron, though he was more muscular than Ron, especially in the arms because he was a beater after all. Walking beside Fred wouldn't be bad at all. I smiled and resumed eating. Then randomly Harry started looking at me funny.

Me: What?

Harry: Did you fight with Ron?

Me: Why would you say that? (acting innocent)

Harry: Because you're not sitting beside him and you've been glaring at him.

Me: I haven't been glaring! And it's not like I have to sit beside him or anything.

Harry: Uh… but you always sit beside him.

Me: No! You know what? You and Ginny are so alike it's a surprise you guys aren't together!

And I left the table. You should have seen Harry and Ginny's face when I said it! They were both tomato red and avoiding each other's gaze. I was hoping that would snap some sense into them but it failed… miserably. Ginny came into the room seconds later and glared at me. And to get in her good graces again I offered her my beauty supplies and she gladly agreed to be civil. In other words she squealed and hugged me. Not much happened after… I said good-bye to my parents and they said they'll be here for the wedding (Mrs. Weasley invited them). Professor Lupin and Harry decided to stay the night while everyone left. That was my day.

Ginny is now asking if I finished writing in my diary. I'm denying that it's not a diary but she won't listen. Instead she's planning on using the beauty supplies on me, 'to experiment' were her exact words. I hope I'll still look like myself by tomorrow morning… but seeing that evil glint in Ginny's eye I really doubt it.

**A/N:** I know it's short… I'm sorry! I hope you liked the chapter though! I'm going to try my best to write longer chapters. Oh and tell me what you think about the little convos I put in! Thank you and REVIEW!

**Avanell** – well no one really compliments Hermione on her beauty… so it's likely that she herself doesn't realize it herself. I was thinking about adding interludes by Ron and have his little input… maybe I might not do it but it really depends.

**Stitches** – yeah I thought so… she's such a hard character to master especially because the point of view isn't Hermione's in the book! I hope this chapter is more like Hermione than the last.

**rupert grint is sexy** – longer? Well I think I failed there…

**Wierdgirl5834** – It was actually my friend's idea… my friend was complaining about Voldemort after reading the sixth book and started ranting about Hitler so yeah… glad you liked it!

**x-Drama-Queen93-x-** - OOC means Out Of Character, and thanks for reviewing!

**snoopysmile **– Hey! You reviewed in every story of mine! (there's only two…) Thanks for reviewing! Doesn't it seem like I have a wedding in all the stories I did? I just realized that when you wrote 'I can't wait for the wedding'.

**rheartsu** – You reviewed in every story of mine too! Hermione sound in character? Really? Well that's good! I know… I was ranting about how stupid guys were in the middle of that chapter! Yup she needed that sleep! I like making Hermione a little crazy because even though she looks so organized and sure of herself I think she's actually more lively and passionate, like when she fights with Ron it brings out the true Hermione without the books!

**sorry but** – Thank you! I hope it is going to be good like you said!

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	3. August 27

**A/N:** Please review!!!!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.

August 27

It was horrible! Absolute terror! Honestly for the love of Merlin I hate that Ginny Weasley! Do you know what she did? She's an evil, evil reincarnation of the twins! That's impossible though since the twins are not dead and reincarnation implies that they are… ugh I have to stop contradicting myself! Either way that girl is pure evil! She made me over and then afterwards I wiped off the make up and changed into pajamas. I suppose I didn't realize that Ginny would just put more make up and redress me with a wave of her wand while I slept so that she can prove to me that Ron thinks of me as a girl.

I woke up early, and went downstairs. Ginny was sleeping innocently in her bed (an angel on the outside but a devil in the inside!). Anyway the boys must have woken up earlier than me, which is quite a surprise but I suppose it was the smell of the food that aroused them awake. I entered the kitchen yawning loudly.

Harry: Morning Hermione (he didn't look up from the morning paper that he was reading with Professor Lupin).

Me: Good morning.

Mrs. Weasley: Here you are (she turns to hand me a plate and she sees me) oh Hermione!

Me: What is it?

Everyone else looks up. They were all silent and I started to wonder what was wrong with me? I swore that if it had anything to do with a black eye I'll strangle the twins. But the reaction I got was not laughter but extreme admiration. Most surprising on my part.

Fred: Woah, who's the babe?

George: Why I don't believe it, it happens to be our little Hermione!

Charlie: Not very little is she now?

Mrs. Weasley: (she smacks them on the back of their heads) You boys have no respect for women! I think you look lovely Hermione, but perhaps you should have waited until after breakfast to get dressed up.

Me: Dressed up? What are you talking about? I didn't even change out of my pajamas, let alone brush my hair.

Bill: You mean you just woke up like that?

Me: (me frowning) Woke up like what?

Professor Lupin: Would you like a mirror? (he conjures one up)

Me: (I grab the mirror) Oh my god.

You should have seen me! My face was lightly brushed so that I looked sun-kissed (Ginny's exact words the night before) and she outlined my eyes. I had pink lips and my hair fell in bouncy curls done up in a stylish hairdo. I had dropped the mirror right then. It shattered to pieces on the floor but I didn't give a damn. Immediately I looked down at myself, only to realize that I was wearing a pair of tight jeans and a low top. I clenched my fists and bolted back up the stairs. I glared at Ginny but I had better things to do and I changed out of the clothes and removed the make up. Then with one last glare I ran down the stairs again.

Harry: Morning again. (he smiles)

Me: Morning.

Mrs. Weasley: Don't tell me it was all Ginny's doing. (she hands me a plate)

Me: Yes in fact it was her doing.

George: I believe we taught our sister well. (he snickers with Fred)

Of course Ron didn't say anything the whole time! He was beet red and playing with his food half the time. Harry was much more supportive and acted like this happened everyday. But thank god for Ginny who came down with a silky white nightgown. It was to her knees and had lace on the neckline that skimmed the tops of her breast! She topped my incident and everyone seemed to forget it as they focused on Ginny. I swore Harry's jaw almost fell off… as well as everyone else's except maybe Mrs. Weasley who had bought it for her. All the Weasley males sent her back to her room shouting about decency. Mrs. Weasley gave all of them a whack with her spatula. Ginny hadn't changed but instead put on a light pink robe. She smiled at Harry before eating her breakfast. I think she was going over board… and I have to say, poor Harry. Ron glared at Harry all breakfast and I heard him telling Harry to tell Ginny to stop being a slut.

Even though I said that I won't talk to him again, until he apologizes but I had to say something. So I barged in and told Ron to stop degrading his sister and that she can choose to wear what ever she wants. I stomped out afterwards and the surprised look on Ron's face was priceless. Ginny came up and hugged me she exclaimed that no one could put Ron in his place like I can, not even his own mother. I laughed, but you think about it this has a deeper meaning. What I mean is, perhaps I affect him this way because he cares for me. Like how a big man can be brought to his knees by his wife. How people become vulnerable when faced with the ones they love. Maybe I'm reading too much into it but a girl can hope.

It's near midnight now and I can see the moon from the open window. Ginny insisted we open the window to let the cool night breeze in. It's chilly, but under the blankets it's warm and safe.

I feel as though I spent more of my time at the Burrow than at home. I wonder if mom or dad feel neglected from my life. It's weird… being so different from my own family, living in a totally different world. Magic is my life and to my parents it had been a mere dream in fairytales. This is where I belong now. I may indulge in muggle things every now and then but my heart is where the magic is. It runs through my blood, the old magic.

I remember when Professor Dumbledore had once told me of my great, great grandmother, who also happened to be a witch. He told me I must have gotten her magic… somehow managing to skip my great grandmother, grandmother and my own mother. He told me old magic runs through my veins and its old magic that has brought me here. Pure bloods hold their own old magic… their history is extensive in the magical community, for me though it has only been about a hundred years. All muggleborns start somewhere, whether from a distant relative or just random coincidence. After all, the first sign of magic was started by mere coincidence. All pure blood families started from muggleborns. I suppose then Draco Malfoy and his cronies can eat their words! I'm no mudblood because the same magic runs in both our bloods.

I learned today that magical weddings are quite different from muggle ones. You wouldn't have guessed that it was Fleur herself who has explained it to me. She's rather knowledgeable in just about anything. Anyways I'm going to write my findings here.

It starts off as muggle weddings do. The groom stands at the alter and waits for his bride. The bride's maids and groom's men come down the aisle and finally the bride and her father goes. But in the magical community there is no religion so there is no priest and no lengthy readings. Instead the couple read their vows and place the rings in each other's fingers. Then a complicated spell is done by a chosen witch or wizard to bind the two lovers together. The spell is so fascinating and it's ancient. The spell binding can not be reversed easily; it's like trying to split a soul into halves. I'm going to read more into it; apparently Mr. Weasley has some books in his office of magical wedding procedures.

Well that's not all Fleur did while she was here. She had brought in a designer with her and took my sizes. I was rather surprised to find that my sizes weren't far off from Ginny or Gabrielle's. In fact Ginny's bum size was a tad larger than mine. Fleur smiled so wide and exclaimed she'd have the most beautiful wedding. She said that she had picked out a soft blue for my dress. She brought a sample in for me and the color is gorgeous, it shimmers and is a color sure to impress. The bride's maid's thing isn't turning out as bad as I thought. I think I'll jinx it if I say that… but I can't help but feel excited to dress up and walk down the aisle even if it's going to be with Fred. Come to think of it, it'll be splendid.

When I told Ginny about how Fred was handsome she looked at me funny before bursting into laughter. She told me I didn't have to say those things to try and convince her that I didn't love Ron. I glared at her and said I was doing no such thing. After all I already admitted it, reluctantly… but I did realize I had stronger feelings towards Ron than what I had thought at first. I didn't actually say it aloud so she thinks I'm still in denial.

Ignoring Ron is turning out to be a feat. It's so difficult when the only thing I want to do is spend time with him. He doesn't seem fazed at all, playing quidditch with his brothers and playing chess with Ginny. In fact he looks happier than he had been when with me! Ginny had told me otherwise.

I'm starting to suspect that other people in the household are noticing how little Ron and I are spending time together and I'm afraid someone will mention it. Ginny already knows and assured me Ron won't ever think of me as anything but a girl. I'm not convinced though because he had never been nervous around me like he always is around other girls. He can't consider me a girl as long as I'm his mate. Ginny keeps saying don't you remember today at breakfast? I have to say is reaction along with the other members of the household was shocking but that wasn't me. It was a made over me and if I have to be made over all the time to gain recognition as a girl then no thank you!

I've been getting into the habit of staring at Ron. I hadn't noticed until today when Ginny elbowed me hard and told me to stop it. (I'll add in a little skit to replay what happened)

Me: (me glaring at Ginny when she elbowed me) What?

Ginny: You were staring. (she shrugs)

Me: Staring? What in Merlin's name- (gasp) you mean at him! (I point at Ron then shake my head) NO! No? No.

Ginny: (she rolls her eyes) You guys are so clueless, I mean come on you were practically drooling on the spot! I can't believe he didn't notice! Sheesh Hermione you have some obsession!

Me: Oh that's rich coming from you Ginny who's had quite an obsession over one of my best mates, and is still pinning after him!

Ginny: At least he's something to go after unlike a pathetic excuse like my brother!

Me: He's perfectly fine!

Ginny: Then why in the world are you not talking to him when he's 'perfectly fine'?

Me: We've had a spat that's all! (I cross my arms)

Ginny: You mean you're holding a grudge; he doesn't have a clue why you're mad at him!

Me: He'll just have to figure it out.

Ginny: Trust me he's tried, he's already asked me a million times what was wrong with you or if he had done something wrong.

Me: Well obviously he's done something wrong! Why else would I not talk to him?

Ginny: Don't tell me, tell him!

Me: Why should I? He should apologize first!

Ginny: How can he apologize when he has no idea what he's done wrong?

Me: Well if he knows he's done something wrong he should just say sorry!

Ginny: (sigh) This is getting no where. I just want Ron off my back; can you just talk to him?

Me: No, he doesn't deserve my mercy. Not after what he said.

Ginny: It probably just slipped out. You know he says things without thinking.

Me: That means he probably doesn't think I'm a girl! (I stand up) I had enough of him being so stupid! Just leave me alone! (run upstairs)

I admit it; it was emotional of me to just leave like that when Ginny was only trying to help. But first of all I was embarrassed that she caught me staring at her brother. Honestly I can't help it because he has the most gorgeous hair I've ever seen! I've always wondered how it was so golden looking sometimes and other times it was so radiantly red. Of course Ron was playing quidditch and since he's confidence improved he was looking rather dashing zipping through the sky on his broom. You have to say that he's quite eye catching. Especially when he's done playing and comes in the house all sweaty but energized with that blazing look in his eyes. You just can't help but sigh. Oh no, don't tell me I just went off about Ron. This is getting more personal… not to mention embarrassing.

Anyways back to the conversation with Ginny. So it turns out that Ron has noticed that I haven't been talking to him at all lately. I hope it teaches him a lesson about commenting on my feminism. At least Harry has some sense to respect people's feelings instead of blurting things out!

Oh I shouldn't compare them, Ron already feels shadowed by Harry. If only he'd see all the good things that I see in him. Honestly Ron shouldn't be worried at all about being less than Harry. But that's besides the point, it's not like he's ever going to listen to me, he's a git and whatever I say goes through one ear and comes out the other.

I pondered over talking to Ron again. I suppose you could say I was being rather mean by just cutting him off. He doesn't know what he's done, though he ought to know. But you know what? I've waited out this long for him to say sorry, so I'm going keep going until he finally gets it through to his head.

Hopefully it'll be soon because it's boring without Ron. Ginny is fine company but she can never offer the same amusement Ron can. They have different humor and thoughts and I like a balance of both.

I'm so emotional lately and have been changing mood to mood as quickly as the Weasley men eat their food. Ginny asked me if it was my time of the month. I told her no not yet. I don't know what's wrong with me, it'd been happening ever since the beginning of the summer. Maybe I've changed my life style and that's making me act differently. Let's think what have I taken out?

Books? No.

Food? No.

Sleep? Not quite.

Homework? No, I give myself homework.

I can't think of anything else. Maybe it's just a phase and it'll be over soon. Or I'm just recovering over Professor Dumbledore's death. Perhaps I'm just paranoid over the whole Voldemort thing. I don't know what's wrong! It's frustrating and I have nothing to vent my anger on! That's it! My anger! I haven't vented out, except in writing! Usually I do my anger venting at Ron when we argue because not only is it easy and sort of refreshing but it also helps keep my mind in check. Some times it gets out of hand, when we're talking about Lavender or Victor and quidditch or responsibility. But most of the time it's more like a debate on our opinions that helps us relieve stress.

Wait.

Does this mean I need Ron? That I need to talk to him? If I don't I might drive everyone crazy with my stupid mood swings? Oh Lord… why me?

If I don't talk to Ron soon I'll probably just burst out of anger and stress! Now I really need to make Ron apologize! How though? Do I subtly engage conversation? Ugh but then I have to take the first step! I don't want to do that and look desperate in front of him when I started the whole don't-talk-to-Ron thing! This is horrible! Each day I find something about Ron that is essential to my life! I'm becoming too dependant on him.

If Ginny read this book she'd probably die of laughing, I think she enjoys my torture. But gosh what am I going to do about Ron? I have to make him apologize, and soon before I go crazy! Ugh that prat he never just says sorry does he? He has to make it into a big deal! I hate him, I hate him, I hate him! Okay that's a lie but I am angry at him!

I need to create a clever plan to get him to say sorry. Maybe I'll casually bump into him and just walk away and then he'll stop me... it'll be like in a movie!

Me and Ron bump into each other.

Me: (looks away and walks past him) hmph!

Ron: Wait Hermione! (grabs my wrist)

Me: (turn my head) what?

Ron: I- I'm so sorry for saying you weren't a girl because you are and I love you!

Me: Oh Ron I love you too!

Ron: (holds me against his muscular chest!)

Okay maybe I went a little out of hand with my imagination. I mean Ron would never say I love you. I doubt he even does… why do I have to have an unrequited love? When did I get so corny and act like a cheesy heroine in a romance novel? I've been reading way too many romantic novels in the summer, which by the way I brought to the Burrow. I mean just for a little light reading. I read it very little though, every time I pick one up to read Ron' words repeat over and over again in my head. Then I get so sick of it. I can't even read! He is really putting a cramp in my style! I swear if this isn't over by this week I'm going murder someone!

**A/N: **Sorry for a late update… I was sick for some time and I had to do exams! anyways I'm back and I will be updating sooner… hopefully but that is uncertain as of yet. The chapter isn't one of my finest work and I think it's a little bleh but I hope it's not too bad and that you'll like it. A little Hermione smartness coming up in the middle about weddings and old magic blood.

**CoNnY-B** – don't we all intend to write a 'journal' and end up writing a diary? lol anyways thanks so much for the review and I'm glad my stupid 'dialogues' inbetween don't sound weird!

**xxkarinexx **– sorry I didn't update in ages… turns out I wrote the whole thing but I just forgot to post it… I want to portray the characters well but I don't know

**rheartsu** – well yeah she can't be in denial the whole time… come on we already have Ron in denial so we need at least one person who'd smart enough to realize it!

**Luna Forest** – that's true you can be any body… but the thing is are the other people Hermione described like they are really them in character? For example Ginny?

**snoopysmile** – yeah 'my weddings' lol I've only been to a few weddings in my life but I watch far too many movies… I guess I get my inspiration from there. Anyways I didn't want to let Ron walk her down the aisle it's way too coincidental I want it to be Fred because I love that guy! He's like one of my favorite characters and he comes far too few times in the book in my opinion. Yes maybe we'll see a jealous Ron…

**InkGothical **– well Ginny is kinda off but I manipulate her to my will. I hope you liked this one and I don't know about the epilogue still running short on ideas…

**ProtegoNox** – well I didn't update soon but I hope you like it anyways!


	4. August 28

**A/N: **Oh jeeze I'm so sorry that I updated so late! Waaaah I'm being such a procrasinator!! I'm supposed to be writing my english essay right now and I'm not even half way finished!! Anyways this chapter was written like a month ago and i forgot to post it so my deepest apologies. Enough of me rambling... I dount any of you reads this anyways...on with the story!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter but I wish I did... who wouldn't wish they did?

August 28

Today was such a surprising day my hand is shaking as I write this! It's a day sure to go down in history… okay more like my journal but never the less it was an excellent day! There were just so many things that have happened that I don't know where to begin, but I suppose I should begin from the beginning after all it does have the word begin in it!

The day starts off normally, not like yesterday. I wake up and check myself in a mirror to make sure I looked like Hermione Granger and not a Barbie doll. I was happy to report that I looked perfectly normal with the exception of bushy hair. But I comb it and it fell into place much better and of course I changed out of my pajamas into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. Nothing was amiss. I opened the curtains in the room letting in the glaring sunlight on purpose because I know Ginny hates that. It's payback for yesterday. I skipped out of the room after hearing Ginny's groaning, which made me smile.

Breakfast was likewise, I sat down and ate breakfast with Charlie because the twins and Ron were still sleeping. Ginny came down soon after and gave me a glare. I pretended I didn't see it and went on munching on my toast. Harry and Professor Lupin went back to Grimmauld Place yesterday so they weren't here.

After breakfast I walked up stairs and brushed my teeth and washed my face and hands. I tied my hair and grabbed myself a book I borrowed from Mr. Weasley about the binding spell used in weddings. I sat down in my usual chair in the living room and opened the book.

The book is ancient! Almost as ancient as the spell and the spell has been around since marriage has been around. I love old books it smells of paper and the pages are thin due to the ages but it gives me a sense that I can grasp a hold of something that many people before me had. A sense of pride that I too can learn from the same pages as Professor Dumbledore or dare I dream, Merlin! Yes I know what a bookworm I am. I just can't help get excited when I get my hands on a new book filled with possibilities of gaining knowledge that could help me in the near future. Though how can a binding spell used in weddings help in the battle against Voldemort I have no idea.

But this wasn't the surprising thing that had happened. It was Ron; he walked up to my chair and sat right beside it. I didn't acknowledge his presence and went on doing what I'd been doing during my stay here, ignoring him. He didn't do anything for a few minutes and I read the same sentence six times. Ron is a big distraction you know and I couldn't concentrate a single bit!

Suddenly he leans over and looks at my book. I got so flustered, who wouldn't when the object of their desires leans over towards them. He was so close that I could if I had wanted to count every single eyelash of his. I didn't, I mean that's way too obsessive. Not to mention the fact that I was too focused on the way his hands lightly brushed my thigh. When he reads the title his eyebrows crinkled and he asked why I'm reading on the binding spell. His exact words were: "The wedding spell? Why are you reading about that?"

I didn't answer; I was pondering on whether I should just talk to him or ignore him. It was tough; he was even willing to talk about a book! I thought maybe I should let it slide and just talk to him. He was one of my best mates and I really wanted to talk to him. It's been so long since we'd talked and I was at the end of my limit.

I had opened my mouth to answer when he beat me to it.

Ron: Come on Hermione you can't be still mad about what ever you are mad about.

Me: (I pursed my lips) If you don't even know what it is that I'm angry about then you have no right judging whether the thing I'm angry about is a minor matter that I will let it slide so easily.

Ron: But it's been two days, three if you count today.

Me: Maybe you should have spent that time finding out what you did wrong. (I crossed my arms)

Ron: I did! I found nothing; well at least I think it was nothing…

Me: Well you obviously didn't put enough effort into finding out.

Ron: You think I didn't put enough effort? I've spent the last two days asking Ginny what I did wrong, I thought back to everything I've done and I can't bloody figure out why the hell you stopped talking to me! (he stands up and stands in front of me)

Me: (I stand up too, he's so tall it hurts looking up at him) I'm not going to bother explaining what you've done wrong because it's a waste of time!

Ron: What is wrong with you girls? Always getting mad over petty things!

Me: Now you're being sexist? Then what is it with you guys? Always overlooking everything?

Ron: Are you implying that we're stupid?

Me: Well sometimes guys sure do act like idiots!

Ron: (he steps closer) Idiots eh? At least we don't hold stupid grudges!

Me: Maybe it was important to me! Maybe you're just too dense to understand anything! If you think it's so stupid then why are you here trying to solve it?

Ron: Because the reason might be unimportant but you sure aren't!

Yeah he really said that. He said with his own mouth that I was important. I was so dumbfounded that I was rendered speechless. I just stared at him blinking, thinking that I was dreaming and that I'd wake up any minute now. But the thing was that I wasn't dreaming and that Ron deems me important to him. And the only thing that popped out of my mouth was…

Me: Really?

Ron: (he turns red) Well yeah I mean you are one of my best mates and you're important to me. I may not know what I did wrong but I want to fix it, so I'm sorry.

It was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. He was so adorable rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, looking down at his feet nervously. I almost jumped to hug him but I didn't. Instead I smiled. Then he smiled back and everything was right in the world again. It was one of those rare moments where there are no worries on my mind and I can forget everything just because he was here. I know it's really sappy and cheesy but it's true. You have to experience it to really understand. After that moment he starts a conversation about the book again.

Ron: So… mind telling me why you're reading on the wedding spell.

Me: First of all it's not called the 'wedding spell' it's called-

Ron: Just answer the question Hermione.

Me: (I sit back down and turn the book over in my hands) Fleur told me about it yesterday and I wanted to learn more about it. It's so fascinating!

Ron: (he rolls his eyes and sits down on the seat next to me) Well what else did I expect from Hermione Granger the smartest witch of her year.

Me: Don't calling me that! Aren't you interested in the spell? It's going to be used on you in the future.

Ron: Well yeah but the future is so far away.

Me: It's better to be prepared.

Ron: You don't have to know about the spell to have it done on you. Other people do the spell for you.

Me: That's true but I want to know about it anyways. The spell is scary, being bind to someone for the rest of your life, can you imagine?

Ron: It's not scary, not if you really love that person. If you loved that person then wouldn't you want to be bind to them for the rest of your life? I think I would and I'll protect them.

It was the most profound thing I have ever heard Ron say. It was so romantic and I was in awe. Most guys are scared of commitment and being stuck with one person for the rest of their lives will freak them out. But Ron was so… different. He sounded so mature and completely charming. If he had said that to any women on the earth they would fall in love. What girl wouldn't want a guy to say that they wouldn't mind being with one person their whole lives and that they would protect them forever. He really is something. But he'll never be mine… will he?

Enough about that, back to the conversation…

Me: That's a nice way of looking at it.

Ron: It was Bill who told me that when I asked him.

Me: The wedding's in a few days isn't it?

Ron: Four days, on September the first.

Me: It's going to be a beautiful wedding, is it here in the Burrow?

Ron: Yeah, in the garden. Fleur suggested it saying it was romantic or something. I have no idea how it's romantic when it's just a yard with stupid gnomes.

Me: (I laugh because it's so typical Ron to say that) I think it's romantic to get married in a garden, especially when I know that man I was marrying was raised there.

Ron: I still don't get it… mum says she'll be having some flowers brought in. By the way I think she said that she wanted you to come with her, Ginny and Fleur, something about a girls' day out.

Me: When?

Ron: Tomorrow I think, because it's a Saturday.

Well it would be interesting wouldn't it? Going into Diagon Alley with two of the most beautiful girls I know and a mother. I'm sure they'll be turning heads everywhere. Ginny will probably not notice the attention while Fleur fusses over the flowers while Mrs. Weasley sighs dreamily. It's all too predictable. The day will be lovely, being just the girls. There'll be gossip which I don't participate much in but it's fun to listen to. There'll be sweets and shopping, a treat to the exhausting week I've had.

Ron and I hung out for the rest of the day. I read my book while he sat next to me reading a quidditch magazine. That's the only thing he reads unless he has to for homework. I didn't comment on it like I usually did because I liked the nice silence that we shared. It was nice just being with him even if we weren't talking. Communication wasn't needed because best friends can rest easy in silence as well.

After I finished reading I found him dozing off on the couch. I shook him awake and we ended up playing a game of chess. Well it was obvious that I'd lose but it was fun playing with him anyways. I think something has to be competitive for Ron to focus and actually put effort into what he is doing. He's so smart when playing chess but during class he's always acting stupid. It really has to grab his attention for anything to be done with that brain of his. Don't' get me wrong, he's smart it just that he doesn't care.

I want to tell him about my feelings but I'm so afraid of what will happen. What if our friendship is ruined forever? Or he'll be disgusted… maybe he'll laugh. But I can't hide it forever! How can I cope with it? I just can't!

I need a good plan, a 'mAke Ron Fall In Love With mE Plan," in short ARFIL-WEP! I'll have to recruit Ginny into this plan and ask her for help. I can't wait until tomorrow! The girls' day out sounds so exciting! I know I'm not much of a shopping kind of girl but I find myself indulging in those activities more often now.

I'll need some tips so I'll have to puck up some magazine while I'm out, and I'm sure Ginny will supply me with a bunch. She's so sick of me moping about her brother that she'll be glad to direct my attention to this even if she still thinks Ron isn't good enough for me. How is he not good enough?

Though I have to admit he wasn't the Prince Charming I had in mind when I was younger. I always dreamed of tall, dark and handsome. Someone who sweeps you off your feet and does everything you command. He'll kiss the ground I walk on and lavish me with adoration and gifts. Instead I ended up falling for a cute red head who loves to argue but hates to apologize. Likes to do the opposite of what I tell him and never seems to appreciate me. But ideals change don't they?

Well enough about that on with the rest of the day. Professor McGonagall came by today and put a hand on my shoulder. Then she asked me very seriously if I might consider joining the Order of the Phoenix.

I'm not lying I swear.

Can you believe it?

I nearly fainted on the spot!

Then she explained that the members are running short and that she is planning on asking Ron and of course Harry. She also talked about how there's going to be responsibility and how there'll be sacrifice and maybe even my life. I stopped her and told her that I had my life sealed as soon as I met Harry. I said that I already knew the consequences. I'm ready. She smiled and said she knew she could count on me and how I'm going to be a great asset to the Order.

I thought over whether or not I should explain about the information Harry had disclosed to Ron and I but I decided against it. It's only right that Harry should explain it because he knows better than I do. When he joins we can tell them all.

I can feel that Professor McGonagall is very wary and now anxious about every member. Ever since the Snape incident she feels so betrayed and lost. Dumbledore trusted that man, how could he… I don't even want to talk about it. It hurts to think about that.

After this I felt confused about Voldemort and the things that are happening. I needed some comfort but Ginny was out with her mother and everyone seemed to be gone or busy. So when I saw Ron lying on his bed I walked in the room without hesitation. I walked up right to the side of the bed and peered down at him.

He peeked one eye open and was shocked to see me. He nearly fell of the bed in surprise. He asked me what I was doing in his room but I didn't answer him but asked if I could lie down with him. His jaw dropped and he started sputtering. I don't have exactly how to interpret his reaction so I repeated my request. He closed his mouth and nodded. Then he moved over to create some room on the singles bed. I curled up next to him and gripped his shirt. Then I buried my face into his shirt and sighed.

It was strange when he started to pet my hair and comb through the locks. It was very relaxing and I closed my eyes breathing in his clean soap scent. His arm fell around me and rested on my hip. We laid in silence like that when he started to speak.

Ron: What's wrong?

Me; (dozing off) Mmm

Ron: (deep chuckle) Hermione?

Me: (I snuggle closer and drift off to sleep)

Ron: There has to be something wrong, you're acting unHermione-like.

Me: (I open my eyes and move back to face him) Pray tell what is 'Hermione-like' then?

Ron: (taken back) Well… just you know…

Me: No I don't know do explain.

Ron: You act um… independently?

Me: Is that a question or a statement?

Ron: A statement?

Me: You don't seem too sure about that…

Ron: Oh come on Hermione why are you making a big deal out of nothing? I just wanted to know what was wrong.

Me: Oh what makes you think something's wrong?

Ron: You act it.

Me: What's that supposed to mean?

Ron: I mean that you're worrying me because you're sort of acting like you did at the… the funeral.

He whispers the last part so that I barely catch it. My breath hitches and I stare at him dumbfounded. He's worried? Why does he act so sweet like this? Can't he be mean so that I can stop loving him? Like they say, be cruel to be nice.

Me: Nothing's the matter… well not really. It's just I'm so confused about Voldemort and Snape.

Ron: (grip tightening around my waist at mention of Snape's name) Snape… that bastard.

Me: Ron?

Ron: Sorry… I guess I'm confused too. But no worries everything will work out.

Me: You really think so?

Ron: Of course, with that brain of yours nothing's a puzzle for long.

Me: (I narrow my eyes) Is that all you think of me as?

Ron: (bewildered) No, it's just one of your… er… finer qualities. Man Hermione everything I say has a double meaning don't it?

Me: (I laugh) I'm tired.

I yawned and fell asleep in his arms. He also fell asleep and that's how Ginny found us. She laughed so hard and squealed about it to the whole Burrow. We ended up being the laughingstock of the dinner table. Everyone poked fun at us even the adults, Fred and George especially. We of course turned twenty shades of red until Mrs. Weasley put a stop to the teasing and was the saving grace.

Even through that I don't regret sleeping with him. Wait if you read that sentence over again it implies something very… well… it sounds as if Ron and I… did other things than sleeping… What am I thinking! Sleepiness must be getting to me. I should retire to bed now it's getting late and we are going shopping.

Tonight I shall have sweet dreams of having Ron's arms around me, he really is comfortable. Well good night.

**A/N: **Well that's that. A fluffy chapter to reward my faithful reader who review!!!! REVIEW PEOPLE PLEASE OR I'LL FEEL DISCOURAGED!! By the way thank you to all who reviewed! It was much appreciated.

**ProtegoNox** - Thanks so much for your review! Yeah Hermione's a little... you know unHermione-like... well it is her diary, I mean journal so she gets to act as she want to! Well he apologizes here so I hope it's to your satisfaction! Ooooh maybe I'll make her throw her diary, I mean journal at him... hmmm good idea!!

**Luna Forest** - You have a friend like Hermione:) Thank you i hope you thought this was a good chapter too!

**rheartsu** - Yeah Hermione's insane! I don't do my homework instead I'm writing random fiction... half of them I delete before I put it up!! Well enjoy this chapter!!

**Desepere Romantique** - Positively brilliant? That is so like what Ron would say!! Thank you for your wonderful review!! Sorry for the late update!!

**snoopysmile** - Woah long review!! I love you!! I know school is stressful I don't review often either... shame on me... Yeah I love Ginny and writing about the guys are so fun! Yeah the last part was like a fantasy thing for Hermione! It was pretty funny eh? A smart witch like her should be reading not dreaming abotu Ron's muscular chest!! The wedding will be better than the other wedding because obvious in Hermione's own personal thoughts it'll be more romantic. It'll be comign up soon, September 1st!

**YuniX-2** - Awww thanks! Sorry for making you wait so long... I'm way too lazy to be a writer... it requres so much work!! Anyways I hope you find this chapter an enjoyable read!


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